Car Culture Shock

Simple task, right? Wrong. Ignore the fact that my lifestyle in Europe had spoiled me with excellent public transportation and well-near convinced me that I’d rather use good trains than own a car ever again. And skip the challenging recalibration of my psychology to accept that life in America, especially rural life in America, requires a car. My mission to once again become a car owner loomed more colossal with each passing day.

First, there was the issue of points on my license. Officer Jollycopper’s legacy affected me in a peculiar way, postponing the purchase of a car and prolonging the research phase. With all of those points on my license, I could expect a vertiginously high insurance rate on a new car, unless… Apparently I could take a New York State Defensive Driving Course and drop up to four points off my license. And Colorado was supposed to trim another two since I had paid the fine in a timely manner. That would clean the slate, restoring my previously pristine driving record and dropping my insurance rate.

So I enrolled in a AAA course and began researching automobiles. Scheduled for the end of July, the weeks prior to attending the Defensive Driving class offered ample opportunity for familiarizing myself with what sort of vehicle I should buy. My needs were pretty straightforward: four wheel drive (to manage my mile and a half long driveway during North Country winters), good gas mileage, second-hand (but gently used), inexpensive ($5,000-$10,000) and comfortable for long road trips. Oh, and if it were green and traffic-stoppingly cool looking, well, then I’d just have to live with that!

The good news was that the second-hand automobile market was (and is) swamped with four wheel drives. And even better news, because of the glut, prices were (and are) relatively low. So it looked like two of my needs were going to be pretty easy to fulfill. I began researching cars. For starters, I discovered that virtually every automobile manufacturer in the mass commercial market produces at least one 4x4 model. I also discovered that the SUV, ubiquitous with the 21st century American lifestyle, was not only the principal way of delivering four wheel drive, it also (as a class) represents the worst fuel efficiency in almost thirty years. I have to admit, there was a part of me that longed for an SUV, first and foremost because that’s what dominated the market. Abundantly available, the prices were surprisingly low, especially compared to the exorbitant cost of vehicles in Europe. And there’s also that Darwinian survival instinct that begins to click in: if everyone else is driving these tanks and I’m in an efficient compact what happens in a collision? Fears of extinction fueled my “if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em” rationale. And yet, the more I read, the more I compared, the more disgusted I became.

I’m not prepared to jump onto the proverbial soap box about fossil fuel consumption, US foreign policy, excess production, the automotive lobby, petroleum lobby or any of those other “hot” issues directly or indirectly related to the SUV phenomenon. Not here. Not now. And I have to admit, I’m still trying to sort it all out myself. But it was quickly clear to me that I had no business buying a vehicle, no matter how cool and robust, that gets fewer miles to the gallon than the behemoths that lumbered the tarmac when I was growing up. Not when we can produce super-efficient, lower polluting, long lasting cars that cost less to produce and hold their value as well as (or better than) most SUVs. I’m no scientist, nor have I made a thorough analysis of the current automotive industry, but suffice to say, by the time my Defensive Driving course was supposed to take place, I had made up my mind. I would not be purchasing another Toyota LandCruiser—old or new—and I would not be buying one of their many relatives that had all but obscured the alternatives.

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